You. Are. Enough.
Do you know that? Do you believe that?
I had the pleasure of attending a retreat this weekend to revamp my business, learn new tidbits, set goals and get motivated.
Towards the end of the event we partnered up for an exercise. Since I’ve attended retreats like this before, I had an idea of what was going to happen but wasn’t completely sure. This exercise ended up being more than I imagined.
We had just been discussing the idea of letting go. Letting go of false and limiting beliefs that we’ve been carrying with us for too long. Letting go of the hurtful things that people have said to us that we believed to be true. Letting go of the past so that we could be present. We were told to think of what false ideas we had about ourselves and come up with what the opposite, more positive idea would be.
The thing that I’ve been holding on to is that I’m “shy”. I’ve always been a quiet and more observant person. I don’t feel the need to talk unless spoken to or unless I have something to add to a conversation. Because of this people would characterize me as being quiet and shy. Growing up I never really thought much about it, I just took it as that’s who I was: shy. Only until recently have I realized that quiet and shy are not the same thing and that being labeled as shy also made me feel less confident.
So for the activity I chose the statement “You are confident” to be the opposite of being shy. Once we picked our statements and our partners we were instructed that one person would close their eyes while the other person would go around the room and say their positive statement to the people with their eyes closed.
I got to close my eyes first. I stood there already feeling pretty vulnerable and waited for people to come say their positive affirmation to me. Women that I didn’t know and couldn’t see, came up to me with a gentle pat on the shoulder or would hold my hand and whisper positive affirmations and encouraging words into my ear. And they played slow, sappy, emotional music while this happened. It was emotional, and I couldn’t stop crying.
This was such a powerful activity. Not only do you get to go around the room saying your affirmation, but you’re affirming others and when you have your eyes closed you receive affirmations, ones you hadn’t even thought of.
During this activity, one of the things that I noticed when I had my eyes closed, was that a majority of people said, “You are enough.” Hearing this made me feel empowered, but realizing how much it was said was alarming.
Why is it that we don’t feel enough?
What does ‘enough’ even mean?
According to Merriam-Webster, enough means occurring in such quantity, quality, or scope as to fully meet demands, needs, or expectations.
Wow. To FULLY meet demands, needs or expectations. No wonder we don’t feel like enough. To me, I interpret the demands, needs and expectations to be external. We are always trying to do things for other people. We want approval, we want to finish tasks that benefit others, we want to help fulfill others needs, we want to comply to others expectations of ourselves.
How crazy is it that we feel the need to FULLY meet these external things? We put so much pressure on ourselves to please everyone else. And then of course, we take the expectations of others and raise the bar thinking we need to always go above and beyond. We think we need to be super woman and handle everything to be enough.
We need to stop putting so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect. No one is perfect. And being enough doesn’t mean being perfect. We need to redefine what being enough means. Be enough for yourself, not others. You were created with everything that you need already inside of you.
Trust me, beYOUtiful, you ARE enough.